[et_pb_section admin_label=\u201dsection\u201d background_image=\u201dhttp:\/\/spiritwithasmile.com\/MS\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/Morning-Meditation.jpg\u201d transparent_background=\u201doff\u201d allow_player_pause=\u201doff\u201d inner_shadow=\u201doff\u201d parallax=\u201doff\u201d parallax_method=\u201doff\u201d custom_padding=\u201d40px|40px\u201d padding_mobile=\u201doff\u201d make_fullwidth=\u201doff\u201d use_custom_width=\u201doff\u201d width_unit=\u201don\u201d make_equal=\u201doff\u201d use_custom_gutter=\u201doff\u201d][et_pb_row admin_label=\u201drow\u201d make_fullwidth=\u201don\u201d use_custom_width=\u201doff\u201d width_unit=\u201doff\u201d custom_width_percent=\u201d82%\u201d use_custom_gutter=\u201doff\u201d padding_mobile=\u201doff\u201d allow_player_pause=\u201doff\u201d parallax=\u201doff\u201d parallax_method=\u201doff\u201d make_equal=\u201doff\u201d column_padding_mobile=\u201don\u201d custom_padding=\u201d30px|30px\u201d][et_pb_column type=\u201d4_4\u2033][et_pb_blurb admin_label=\u201dBlurb\u201d title=\u201dThe Second Pathway To Unconditional Love\u201d url_new_window=\u201doff\u201d use_icon=\u201doff\u201d icon_color=\u201d#000066\u2033 use_circle=\u201doff\u201d circle_color=\u201d#000066\u2033 use_circle_border=\u201doff\u201d circle_border_color=\u201d#000066\u2033 icon_placement=\u201dtop\u201d animation=\u201dtop\u201d background_layout=\u201dlight\u201d text_orientation=\u201dleft\u201d use_icon_font_size=\u201doff\u201d use_border_color=\u201doff\u201d border_color=\u201d#ffffff\u201d border_style=\u201dsolid\u201d header_font=\u201dHappy Monkey|on|||\u201d header_font_size=\u201d28\u2033 header_text_color=\u201d#000066\u2033 body_font_size=\u201d18\u2033 header_line_height=\u201d1.4em\u201d body_text_color=\u201d#000066\u2033]<\/p>\n
by Gregg Sanderson<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n I am discovering how my consciousness-dominating addictions create my illusory version\u00a0of the changing world of people and situations around me.<\/em><\/p>\n * * * * *<\/em><\/p>\n Emotional needs, or \u201caddictions\u201d as Ken Keyes calls them, are simply programs in your mind of how the world should be.\u00a0 They\u2019re expectations founded in fear\u2026 And the ONLY cause of suffering.<\/p>\n In our view, there are two basic emotions, love and fear.\u00a0 Love goes from feeling OK to passionate exhilaration and everything in between.\u00a0 Fear goes from mild annoyance to stark terror and everything in between.\u00a0 Love is more fun.<\/p>\n When something or somebody doesn\u2019t fit your program, fear sets in, often disguised as anger, frustration, jealousy or something else that sure ain\u2019t love.<\/p>\n Suppose, for example, you see your significant other and a stranger off in a corner, whispering, laughing and looking over at you. Then, shortly thereafter, you look for them and they are no longer there.<\/p>\n What goes through your mind?\u00a0 Does it fit your picture of proper behavior?\u00a0 What are your feelings?\u00a0 Are you tempted to check the bedrooms? Is the car still outside? Where could they be?<\/p>\n I\u2019ll bet you never considered that they were planning a surprise party for you and the other person was a caterer.<\/p>\n That\u2019s the second pathway in action. Needs create fantasies about the way things are. It reminds you that what you don\u2019t know CAN hurt you or, more accurately, can trigger your programming, and that hurts.<\/p>\n I am discovering how my consciousness dominating addictions\u2026<\/em>\u00a0They\u2019re never out of mind.<\/p>\n \u2026\u00a0create my illusory version\u2026\u00a0<\/em>It\u2019s MY illusion, nobody else\u2019s.<\/p>\n \u2026of the changing world<\/em>\u00a0of\u00a0people and situations around me<\/em>. It\u2019s always changing, so my perception in this moment might not be valid in the next.<\/p>\n Need also affects the way you view other people.\u00a0 When you operate from need, you can\u2019t see beyond it.\u00a0 Instead, you see people either as suppliers or as competition.\u00a0 For example, take the womanizer who sees women only as conquests and men only as competition.\u00a0 He never gets to see and enjoy the whole person (same goes for the \u201cmanizer,\u201d of course).<\/p>\n Every addiction narrows your view of people through the lens of satisfy or compete, and it narrows your life experience accordingly. Look, for example, at a need for approval.<\/p>\n When you\u2019re addicted to approval and consider a course of action, your first thought is \u201cWhat will people think?\u201d not \u201cWill it work?\u201d or \u201cThis will be fun.\u201d\u00a0 You see other people either as approvers or threats \u2014 sources of acceptance or rejection.<\/p>\n I was once at a guest night for a teaching founded on the need for approval.\u00a0 An obviously shy student next to me summoned up all his courage, extended his hand, and introduced himself.\u00a0 I could feel his anxiety.<\/p>\n Being the kindly soul I am, I smiled and shook his hand, and had the stark realization that I could have destroyed him with a sneer.\u00a0 What power he handed me in that moment!\u00a0 Without the need for approval, he could have gone through the exact same motions and it would have conveyed a completely different message<\/p>\n The most difficult addiction to overcome is the need to be right, and here\u2019s a one-word demonstration of how the addiction creates your \u201cillusory version.\u201d.\u00a0 Ready? \u2026 Be aware of your reaction\u2026\u00a0 Here\u2019s the word:<\/p>\n Obama.<\/p>\n Here are three possible thoughts that may come to mind.<\/p>\n \u201cOMG, Gregg\u2019s a Democrat!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOMG, Gregg\u2019s a Republican!\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSo what\u2019s the point?\u201d<\/p>\n The first two OMGs will produce feelings of acceptance or rejection depending upon your own point of view. Those are the emotional reactions from a need to be right.\u00a0 There\u2019s one other possible reaction I could only get from my editor: \u201cOMG, Gregg\u2019s getting political!\u201d<\/p>\n My point, and the point of the second pathway, is that needs keep you from perceiving people fully, and restrict your options as you live your life.<\/p>\n I assure you there\u2019s nothing wrong with being right or wanting approval. It\u2019s nice that folks agree with you and like what you\u2019re doing.\u00a0 It\u2019s addictive programming though, when it dominates your consciousness or limits your action.<\/p>\n There is a way out, and that way is the key to personal happiness and a stress-free life.\u00a0 Maybe I\u2019ll tell you about it next month.*<\/p>\n *If you need to know it all right now \ud83d\ude42 send me your e-mail and I\u2019ll send you a .pdf book that tells all about it.\u00a0 gregg@newthoughtglobal.org<\/p>\n =========================<\/p>\n Gregg Sanderson<\/strong>\u00a0is author of\u00a0Spirit With A Smile, The World According To BOB.\u00a0<\/em>He is\u00a0<\/em>a licensed practitioner in the Centers for Spiritual Living, and a Certified Trainer for Infinite Possibilities. His earlier books were,\u00a0What Ever Happened To Happily Ever After?\u00a0<\/em>and\u00a0Split Happens \u2013 Easing The Pain Of Divorce.<\/em><\/p>\n